April Fool’s Day… A day dedicated to fools and all things foolish. However, this blog isn’t really going to be about anything lighthearted or funny, or something to lighten the mood for the day. It’s a blog about being fooled, willingly, unwillingly, who knows by which means as it is different for every person.
I read a comment about a past Shmoozezone member, touting all their wonderful abilities and accomplishments and it did not come without a grimace on my part. It’s funny how skewed the world can be when they take the word of an individual at its face value, not willing to challenge or question its/their authenticity.
It’s easy to do on the internet. The subterfuge, the lying, the deception.
GeekGirl, Secret Corners, Kimberly, also known by their birth name of Mark Anthony Haizlip. Yes. You read that right. Kimberly, an adopted name by a guy who desperately wanted to be a female to the point of living a life and a lie behind a computer screen.
It wasn’t always that way. Talk to some past Multiply members and they will tell you that originally Kimberly was open about being trans, being a guy living as a woman. But as time progressed, and especially on the now defunct Shmoozezone website, the truth was buried, hidden from any newcomers. Why? Who knows, personally I think it was to get a broad acceptance from everyone. Claim to be a redheaded woman and who is going to doubt that? It’s much easier to be seen for what you want to be than rather than what you are.
I heard the rumors a lot while on the old Shmooze site, and I put them down to just that, rumors. But then things didn’t start to add up. But after words, actions, and deeds by the Secretive Mr/Ms Corners it started to all make sense.
The gameplaying. OH, and there was a lot of it, and not just with the hidden gender. The playing of GeekGirl off of Secret Corners to confuse all of the new people who didn’t know they were the same person. The asking by GG, an administrator of the site for suggestions of what members wanted, and then dismissing those suggestions without a valid reason. A LOT of the anger and frustration could have been averted over there by mentioning that software was not capable of what members were asking for. That they were not CAPABLE of doing what the members were asking for. Instead, there was so much pussyfooting around the issue so that more unnecessary drama was created.
Then, poor, little, overworked Kimberly could cry on one of the guy’s shoulders, act vulnerable and play a victim worthy of a Victorian novel.
Oh, how terribly tragic it must have been. Wanting to be something she/he could never really ever could be. But, in their own made-up world of make believe, he/she could dream it a possibility.
It took me awhile to understand why Kimberly/Mark seemed to hate women and would fawn all over the men. I still chuckle when I think of her giving Mac a refund, something he/she would never entertain for the likes of any of the women here. And I know, that when Paulo said to Kimberly that they were never friends, it was the real reason why suddenly so many of us were blocked. She needed, desperately needed to be accepted by the guys, not so much the ladies of Shmooze. The gals were competition after all.
A drama Queen? Yes she/he was. She reveled in it. She loved the sense of power, the sense of being finally in control of something in her life. I think it was the only thing that she did have control over.
Rather sad, and I emailed her towards the end of my time there and told her I knew she was a HE. I told her I didn’t care, but that she needed to work with the members or there would be no Shmooze.
But we all know how that ended up. I did hear that later on she did ask if I should be reinstated, but that another member said no. I think Kimberly in her own way recognized a bit of the olive branch I was handing to her at the time, but she was in too far and too deep to change in any sort of way.
Fools, weren’t we all? To think we knew someone, but their spots really can’t ever change, can they? And they are eventually seen for who/what they are. It’s when one continues to grasp onto something or someone when the truth is staring you in the face that you realize, only then you are really a fool/foolish.
Thankfully, I can look back and realize that as hard as I tried to make Shmoozezone grow and flourish, and was one of it’s biggest cheerleaders, that I didn’t fail. I gained some new friends, as well as gained insight to others and what they are made of.
I know some will continue on in the dark, foolishly grasping to something/someone that was just smoke and mirrors. You can lead a fool to the truth, but you can’t make them believe, because what would that make them?
A fool? Or something else?
Have a good evening bloggers.
